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The A-Men

Peebles (A halfling priest played by Chris)

Growing up in Elmshire is a quiet, peaceful life. Temperate climate and four distinct seasons, it’s everything a young hobbit could want. Peebles grew up happy, the fifth of seven children. He loved tending to fields and fern, but above all, other halflings. With his love for all living things, joining the priesthood of Yondalla was an easy choice. Serving until young adulthood, Peebles met Maeris Tosscobble at his first 26th birthday. They were married under the first moon of the High Harvest. Peebles left the church, but maintained his faith, working as a cook and town doctor in a small village five kilometers outside Elmshire. The two knew true joy for nearly 40 years, until Maeris took ill. She wasted away quickly, and died less than two weeks later.

Peebles took the loss hard, burying himself in his work as doctor to a growing number of infections. Several in the community died, and no cure was found. As the ‘plague’ dissipated, Peebles left the village to his assistant, setting out to find new meaning.

Fydillian (A lupin priest played by Matt)

Fydillian the brave is a lupin of the guardian class of shar-pei. Not much is known about his past, as his first memory is waking up on a beach with a no memory beyond that. Fortunately there was a note left with him explaining his name and race. The note vaguely mentioned a higher purpose and that he would know it when it arrived. The note also left directions to a specific location that was conveniently located nearby. Also mentioned in the note was how good of a boy fydillian was and that he was such a brave boy yes such a brave brave doggo. The location proved to be a church of celestian. Fydillian proved to be a natural at navigation and spent alot of time in the library learning about astronomy and history of this strange place. He also discovered the culinary arts and spent as much time in the kitchen. In his studies he learned of the great meteor brought by celestian and set out on an adventure to wander his way to finding it.

The Band of Misfits

Amathar (Gray elf magic-user played by Jeff)

Amathar the Grey is in exile from the Grey Elves (He does not elaborate on this point, though.). He wants to continue his research among the mammals of Oerth, though, so he has wandered to Rookroost with little coin, but made friends with several associates. (Rumble and Skean). They have a relationship to seek out spell components for Amathar and in return, Amathar will help them when he can. Rumble focuses on herbs and rare plants and Skean focuses on small trinkets for Amathar.

Warin (Human cleric played by Coby)

A novice cleric with a yearning for adventure at the beginning of his career, Warin was born and raised on a farm outside Rookroost. Taught to be helpful and kind to his parents, and seeing the state of the world in the Bandit Kingdoms, he joined the small church of St Cuthbert in Darkshelf upon reaching adulthood, hoping that the church would teach him to spread the doctrines of law and order throughout the land. However, he quickly gained experience with the ways of the world after joining the Band of Misfits. His faith was strong, if a little unfocused, and his experiences gradually refined him from a naive altar boy to a brave and skilled adventurer. His calling was strong, but unfocused. If only he had the power to impose his good nature and helpful aims upon the world! If only he could force people to respect the law! Might may not make right, but it seemed that might was the way of the world, and might can for damned sure make people act right!

Warin briefly found moral clarity in answering the demands of a Mysterious Voice that speaks to him through a portal to the elemental planes. Experience has proven that the Mysterious Voice is not helpful with all problems, and an encounter with a wraith left him searching for new and better answers. The cold, cruel world outside the church has proven resistant to naive optimism and cynical embrace of power. Perhaps a new path will make itself clear to him?

Thic Duc (Human Monk played by Dean)

A monk from a distant land (Nyrond), Thic Duc walks the earth in search of impressionable individuals who can be brought to perceive the truth of the one true god. So far, he has successfully converted two people: Kriselle's parents. He would desperately like to complete the set, and the two have spent many hours discussing philosophy, fungi, and religion while peacefully fishing for mushrooms. However, they both felt that there was more to the world than could be found living such a peaceful and sedate life, and now they travel the world in search of adventure, self-improvement, and wealth. To be donated to the poor, of course. Eventually.

His personal ambitions include wall-punching and experiencing every possible way of being knocked unconscious by traps. He would also like to remind the church of Pholtus on Oerth that Pholtus is the only true god, and all the others are impostors.

Due to a quirk in his native language of Nyrondese, in which the letter K does not exist, Thic Duc is sometimes spelled Thick Duck in common. Any resemblance to wide waterfowl is purely coincidental.

Due to a quirk in the Castle Greyhawk dungeons, Thic Duc was accidentally reincarnated in the body of a spiritual messenger of Pholtus.

Tiberium Elyse III (A paladin played by Chris)

Tiberium grew up within a minor noble family located within the County of Urnst. His grandfather, Tiberium the Elder, was granted knighthood and a small estate after making a name for himself in a campaign against an invading tribe of orcs. In the course of that campaign he rescued a gnomish tutor known as Pyrzival, who he later employed as a tutor for his sons. The estate he was granted had been overrun in the orc invasion, and he vowed that his family would ever hold the people of that place safe from invasion. He would repair the ruined fortifications and establish a force of men to keep the peasantry and honest townsfolk under his protection safe. His god heard the vow, but so did others...

When Tiberium III was about 10 food became scarce in the area, and crops were dying. An orc tribe invaded the town, burning what crops they had before they could be harvested, and Tiberium II rode out to meet them, alongside his older brother (Dorian, a paladin candidate) and a small force of knights and men-at-arms. The keep itself, a large project, had not yet been finished and the stores were empty of food due to the poor harvest. Nevertheless, the peasants, children, and those who could not fight, took shelter within its unfinished walls. Among them were young Tiberium III and his tutor, pressed into temporary service as a bodyguard for the boy.

Night fell, and then dawn rose, with no sign of the elder Tiberium's return. The day passed with no further news, but as night fell once more, the orc horde arrived and besieged the keep. The siege was short-lived, however, as a traitor opened the gates in the night, and the defenders were overrun. Pyrzival barely escaped with his life, escorting young Tiberium III and his mother through a secret passage to relative safety. From within the walls they overheard the orc chieftain claiming he had been tipped off to the vulnerable keep by someone within the nobility of Urnst, whose corruption had already caused conflict with Tiberium the Elder.

Fearing betrayal from among the nobiity of Urnst, Pyrzival called in favors and took the young Tiberium and his mother to a small town on the outskirts of Rookroost, known as Dunwitch, sheltering within a secret church of Pelor there.

For the past 6 years, Tiberium III has been raised by his mother within the church; he had already been training as a squire and was hopeful to some day become a paladin like his father. His training only intensified, but the local church lacked the resources and knowledge to continue his formal cavalier training. Their priests taught him what they could, and with time, he became a paladin candidate of Pelor. He has recently passed his last training exercise, and sought permission from the church to follow what he believes is a divine call towards Highport.

His friend Pyrzival plans to accompany him.

Pyrzival (A gnome fighter played by Brian)

Pyrzival was born to two tutors to the royal household in the Great Kingdom. When he was young his parents took employment with the King of Nyrond to tutor his children. Pyrzival seemed destined to be a tutor to noble children as well, as he soaked up not only how to teach but also the information they were teaching -- that of science, engineering, mathematics, and astronomy. One year, when he was just a very young adult, he was sent to the County of Urnst to scout out potential employment, and his group was attacked by a large group of Orcs. Several weeks later, he was rescued by the human paladin by the name of Lord Tiberium Else, the first of his name. Grateful to be rescued, he accepted an offer to tutor the Lords children and stay on at his manor. Determined not to be helpless in the face of violence, he decided to take advantage of being in the service of a Paladin with martial followers, and studied weapons with the master of arms. Years later, the old lord died and his son (already married), inherited and they had children. Pyrzival stayed on to tutor their children.

A few weeks after their only child, young Tiberium Else III turned twelve years old, more orcs again invaded the lands. Pyrzival offered to help some retainers guard the lords' wife and child while the lord and the rest of his retainers went to do battle with the orc horde. The lord and his knights were later found dead, and the orcs captured the keep where the peasants and non-combatants were sheltering. In the chaos, Pyrzival managed to escape with his charges, but discovered evidence of betrayal on the way. Instead of seeking help within the County of Urnst, where another betrayal could cost them everything, he took his charges to Rookroost where they would be safe from assassins until Tiberium grew old enough to claim his majority, his inheritance, and his revenge.

As Tiberium III comes of age, he finds a calling within his soul to the path of the paladin like his father before him, and Pyrzival, with three decades of weapons training but very little actual combat experience, decides to accompany him as he takes service with the church. The two would forge their path together.

Barron (Half-Elven Property Redistribution Specialist played by Matt)

In an illustrious start to his career in Rookroost, Barron was betrayed by his guildmates and sold into slavery on his first day at work. Orientation is a bitch.

Elward Alden is his real name, but when he doesn't trust people he gives out one of his many handles (he is currently using Barron). Raised a bastard love child of a human father and elf mother, he was always looked down upon in the elf community for being a half breed. Some where in his teens he decided to abandon the elf community entirely, tired of the ridicule. He ran away with his childhood friend, Leah another half elf never looking back. They formed a treasure hunting duo, stealing everything that wasn't nailed down... and some things that were. While he would never admit it to anyone, he has never stolen from the poor or innocent that he is aware of.

Recently a group of guards (in another town besides Rookroost and Saltmarsh) got wind of their treasure hunting operation and tried to catch them red handed... being 2 steps ahead of the guards they gave away all their accumulated wealth and treasure to the townsfolk. Leaving them broke and watched by the guards, they fled town again to start over else where. Upon coming to Rookroost Elward learned of a thieves guild and set out to join as a means to improve his skills and ultimately make a butt load of gold.

Barron has a serious distrust for most of the world, especially elves, slavers, and authority figures. He is the more rash decision maker, sometimes letting anger cloud his judgement.

Barron originally carried a stuffed falcon in a cage strapped to his waist. The poor falcon has now suffered the indignity of having Animate Dead used to bring it back to life, complete with stitched on goblin hands, inverted wings, and a goblin-tooth mohawk. The bird now rides on a specially designed perch mounted on Pyro's armor, wearing (when not in flight) a cloak made of white sailcloth. It has been thoroughly plucked and the original features replaced with goosedown from a pillow and glue.

Leah (Half-elven Ranger played by Mariel)

Leah is a ranger whose association with Barron keeps them both in a moral grey area. Her father was an elf, and her mother was a human mage who went insane. Having more elfish features physically (than Elward) she was less teased about being a half elf... but everyone talked behind her back about being the daughter of a crazed mage. She ran away with Elward to escape her past and became the smarter, more level headed half of the treasure hunting duo. She tend to prefer working in the shadows and at a distance, covering Elward with her bow. She has no issues with theft from people she deems unworthy of their riches (typically the rich and especially the mean spirited), or the dead. She was doing some recon on a possible mark the night of Elward's kidnapping and blames herself for not having his back the one time he needed it. She had been waiting in Rookroost for news of his return, where she became acquainted with Kriselle at the Pearly Gates Inn. She joined the party when the group brought the cargo of the Sea Ghost into Rookroost.

Leah travels with a war dog named Pyro (AC: 6, HD 2+2, 14 hp, 1 bite attack for 2d4 damage). Pyro travels with an animated avian zombie perched on its back and has been trained to launch the bird into the air, as well as commands to attack and heel. Various additional commands, including fetch, guard, and desecrate have been attempted with some success.

Mirabelle (Half-elven Cleric played by Sherrie)

Elmond (A Fighter/Cleric/Magic-User played by Dean)

I am the true-born son of Elister Brooks and Nora Brooks (formerly Alden). Unlike my bastard older brother I was grudgingly accepted by my mother's family. Upon coming of age, I was instructed to find my brother and prevent him from besmirching the reputation of the family. I found I enjoyed travelling. In my travels I have not encountered any signs of my brother. I guess this is good for me since I'm technically achieving the assigned goal. I guess I will just enjoy my travels and keep my slightly pointed ears open.

Valadin (A Fighter/Magic-User played by Matt)

Norsk (A half-orc life force repossessor played by Brian)

Orphaned at a young age, Norsk never really knew his parents and grew up on the streets of Rookroost, learning life's lessons the hard way -- the strong take what they want, and the ruthless get what they need. Norsk did a favor for a merchant by removing a rival merchant, and got enough coin from this job to set out on his own.

Seb (A halfling thief played by Chris)

Seb hails from Rookroost, where he's lived all of his life. When he was very young, Seb's mother became bedridden, growing more sick daily. After she passed, his father, Pimzin, began to take seriously his thieves guild duties. Those duties changed him, however. The once good-natured, calm halfling became cold, methodical, and distant. When Seb was 13, his father left their small apartment, and never returned. Seb's heard that Pimzin has risen high within the guild, but recent upheaval among the thieves guild of Rookroost has caused some doubt.

Recently, Seb was assaulted in the streets, by men claiming Pimzin had put a hit on his son. The halfling was able to escape, but fled Rookroost.

Malag (A half-orc fighter played by Chris)

Abandoned as a child, Malag was raised on the streets of Rookroost by local gangs. First unarmed, and then with the sword, Malag rose to be a top enforcer for a group of petty criminals. When the gang was found after pulling a job, Malag escaped alone into the night.

With his cruel nature, and quick fists, he learned quickly that a lot of coin can be made as a bounty hunter. While exploring an abandoned temple near Restenford, Malag was killed by a horde of ghouls. When the Adventure Capitalist's Guild resurrected him, they unknowingly left a curse, condemning Malag to live a pseudo-life of undeath, craving living (or dead) brains. After learning of their error, the Adventure Capitalist’s Guild were able to successfully remove the curse, which included weeks of isolation.

Upon finally being freed, Malag made his way to Highport, where he was recruited to join a crew in pursuit of quick gold. A plan to defraud the Duke of Highport was born, but ill-fated. The perpetrators were found quickly, and imprisoned. For unknown reasons, Malag has been released after only a month. Getting out of the city quickly is in his best interest.

"Leisure Suit" Lenny (Elven Mortician and Insurance Claims Adjustor played by Matt)

The party first met Lenny as he was assisting the Adventure Capitalists with preparing Malag's body for a return to the living following a tragic workplace accident involving hungry zombies. Given the frequency of the party's claims on their insurance, Lenny was assigned to shadow the party and write a report on their adherence to applicable adventure guidelines and safety regulations.

Though he claims to be an elf, Lenny has demonstrated a vulnerability to the Sleep spell and there are rumors he follows a profession normally anathema to elves. Perhaps Lenny's mother has some explaining to do.

Gunnar (Human fighter played by Coby)

Gunnar joined the party when they rescued him from a life of servitude and watery home improvement beneath the evil sahuagin. His past, for the moment, remains a mystery, though his travels with the party gained him experience enough to become a formidable fighter.

Inactive Characters

Elion (Half-elven magic-user played by Jonathan)

Elion wears both a robe and a cloak even while at sea, ensuring certain death by drowning in yards of soaked clothing should he fall overboard for longer than a few minutes without the rest of the party nearby to rescue him. He has few qualms about using his magic to influence his party members, though in his defense, a barbarian not under the influence of a Charm Person spell would likely kill him sooner. Death by a barbarian who just made his saving throw against a Charm Person spell at least has the virtue of being chronologically removed from the moment of first meeting. And besides, perhaps the horse will sing after all.

Kevin (Human druid played by Nathan)

Traveled with the party from Rookroost to Castle Greyhawk. Decided he hated being a courier and took up a new career exploring dungeons. His personality has steadily evolved from happy-go-lucky nature druid to decidedly unhappy red of tooth and claw nature druid. But the Band of Misfits is all about making the world a better place, right?

Michael (Human Cleric played by Larry)

Michael is a mid level cleric and he's fine with that. He's older than some others and a wiser too. He's also fairly charismatic, not enough to found his own cult, at least not yet, but enough to influence those he is close to and keep the attention of small crowds with short folksy homilies. His holy symbol is shaped like his favorite weapons, hammers. His faith is in the effort of a blacksmith to mold the lives of men, knowing that it is not easy and that blows shape the medal best in crisis, in fire, during times of change and upheaval. So he is out in the world looking for companions and crisis, so that he may mold them as and when he can, mold them into better versions of themselves.

Michael knows healing arts (though his patients have mixed opinions), reserving his magic for his second purpose, to preserve his friends from evil until they can be molded as his god desires, and to that purpose his few granted spells involve detection and protection from evil. Je also knows the voice, or command, but is only capable of simple one-word commands. So far in his travels he has supported himself with fishing, and the occasional protection spell. He is affable and easily likable, so he has been hanging out with Fafhrd and the Gray Mouser, often doing their talking for them or helping them get into places they couldn't otherwise. He also tends to get more information from people as they trust a cleric and especially his sort of cleric.

As his traveling companions now include a wizard who enchants his companions without provocation, a reincarnated being with a divine calling that denies his diety, and a thief who delights in his pet zombie falcon, it's unclear who is influencing whom exactly.

Kriselle (Human Fighter played by Mary)

Kriselle's personality so far appears to consist of an inordinate curiosity about rot grubs and a knack for negotiations with merchants, leavened with a healthy respect for the dead that has helped her to avoid awkward moments like greeting a reborn Fred wearing his armor. In fact, her talent and desire for negotiation has expanded to favor negotiating on behalf of some of the creatures the party has come across in their travels, suggesting that if they harmless and pose no threat, it might not be necessary to exterminate them utterly and burn their corpses. So far, this has been less than completely successful.

Pipko (A half-elven magic-user played by Kyle)

Pipko is a nickname given by some friends in the past. A half-elf, he grew up more-or-less as a loner, mostly shunned by both human & elven societies. Nonetheless, he managed to learn something of both cultures, while also learning something about non-human, non-elven cultures & developing a practical culture among his few friends. Pipko's elven background is demonstrated by his being a multi-classed magic user, which profession he learned from a kindly, unorthodox old elf. His human influence shows in his fighting style, which he learned from fellows among his circle of friends & acquaintances. Other characteristics showcase the differences in his human & elven backgrounds. Pipko's below average dexterity & slightly elevated strength do not suggest strong elven heritage, while his poor comeliness seems to indicate an obvious human influence.

Previously finding work occasionally as a sailor, he managed to hone his fighting & non-weapon skills, and he learned some of the basics of navigation, which helped him develop his direction sense. His other non-weapon skills are blind fighting & healing.

Due to good strength & not so good dexterity, Pipko grudgingly wears chain armor to boost his defense - but no shield. Accordingly, he tends to avoid using range weapons, though he is proficient with the long bow. He usually holds a quarter staff in his hand & carries both a long sword & a dagger on his belt. He will drop his staff immediately & draw his sword when a blade is the appropriate response.

As a low-level magic user, Pipko has few spells available & may cast only once per day. His spell availability is further limited by the expensive or scarce materials needed for some of his spells. Thus, Pipko looks for the best opportunities to cast his Enlarge & Read Magic spells. A typical tactic is to enlarge himself or a companion in order to cause greater damage in combat. The reverse is also a possibility: to reduce the size of an opponent in order to protect against excessive damage. This spell can sometimes effectively break doors & other barriers under particular circumstances.

While serving his adventuring companions, Pipko hopes to add new spells to his spell book, and acquire magic items in order to enhance his ability to protect himself in combat.

Daelen (A grey elven magic-user played by Chris)

Daelen was born in Sunndi, to no one of note. His father a bowyer, and mother a blacksmith, his parents discover Daelen has a strong aptitude toward magic, and was quickly enrolled in Magister Iliris Arcane Academy. There, he spend years toiling as an apprentice, constantly in and out of favor. Daelen would follow instruction flawlessly, but regularly questioned lessons, especially regarding 'forbidden' schools.

Finally, frustrated by his lack of progress, Daelen stole into Magister Iliris' chambers, while his master was studying elsewhere. In his spell book, Daelen understood little of higher level spells, but realized the formulae that had eluded him. He returned to his own bed, and spent the next weeks learning and completing the spell on his own.

When he tried it, however, he was interrupted by another student with disasterous consequences. The other student died in the explosion, and Daelen had to flee the consequences of his mistake.

Griff (Halfing thief played by Dennis)

Griff is a halfling who claims to be from "The Shire", a fictional location that does not exist within Oerth.

Hargrimm (Human fighter played by Adam)

Hargrimm joined the party when they rescued him from a life of servitude and watery home improvement beneath the evil sahuagin. His past, for the moment, remains a mystery.

Burgess (Half-Elven Thief played by Karl)

He doesn't like to discuss it much but Burgess comes from a long and proud family history of membership in the Foresters. His grandfather, father, and brother, Haros, are all proud members and groomed Burgess from childhood to one day join them. He studied and trained for years to finally begin his apprenticeship but was almost instantly rejected for being unable to meet their rigorous physical requirements. When news of his rejection reached his family, it brought Burgess great shame and shortly after he ran away from home. Without the path that he had laid out for him his entire life, he was lost and came to Dunwitch in search of a purpose. Unable to find steady work, he quickly fell into a life of petty crime to scrape together money for food and shelter. Eventually, he caught wind of an adventuring crew looking for members and saw a way to make something of himself. Perhaps one day he can return to his family with his head held high...

Kiros (Human Cleric played by Karl)

He worships the deity Fharlanghn, the Dweller on the Horizon, who insists that everyone should travel in order to discover and learn new things. He was initiated by being sent away from his home village to seek out new experiences and to record his journey for the church. Naturally, his task was not defined with a beginning or end, which is not uncommon for worshipers of Fharlanghn. Many believe they continue on this initial journey for the remainder of their lives as Burgess hopes to. He does his best to offer aid and comfort wherever his travels take him. Never one to sit idle for long, he's always listening when a call goes out for help.

Baccarus (Dwarf Fighter played by Karl)

He's come to Dunwitch seeking adventure and treasure! Once part of a stonemason crew, he grew tired of his old life dealing with nothing but inanimate earth day and night. He would listen intently as the older dwarves in his company would rattle on and on about unbelievable (and likely fabricated) stories about their younger days traveling across The Bandit Kingdoms. After scraping together some savings, he purchased a 2 handed sword and began training with it every day. After a year of saving and training, he finally felt ready to set out and pursue his dreams of adventure. When the call went out for adventurers in Dunwitch, he left immediately to join the cause!

Fafhrd (Half-orc fighter played by Larry)

Fafhrd is the offspring of Grog and Juliet. He has lived in and around Dunwitch most of his life. He is large, even for a half-orc, and, as if to emphasize this, he fights exclusively with a two-handed sword, which he has made his specialty. He is proficient with a dagger and a short bow as well, but they most often used for hunting and cleaning of game. He is calm of demeanor, and generally prefers not to speak except to his friend the mouser, although when drinking, he reveals a wonderful singing voice. His mother is also said to have a beautiful singing voice but she doesn't drink like she used to, so few have heard it of late.

Fafhrd swims whenever he gets the chance, and credits this for his pleasant smell, and blames the mouser's dislike of water for his. He is also proficient with rope use, which often comes in handy due to his roguish line of work.

Gray Mouser (Halfling thief played by Larry)

Gray Mouser is an orphan from a far distant city. Fafhrd knows it to be a great coastal city, but not much more. Mouser is secretive. He survived his childhood and intends to survive this part of his life as well, and much like childhood he plans to do that in shadow and darkness if he can, at least for work and when not at work he hopes to spend it in ale houses. Mouser is cynical of speech, but harbors hidden passions and will surprise his companions with his treatment of those truly in need. Fafhrd is his balance, quiet of speech, passionate of action but deeply practical, whereas the mouser can be carried away by whims and the promise of entertainment.

The gray mouser likes to blend in, and disappear and to do this he learned long ago you can't look intimidating or most especially armed. So he became proficient at blind fighting, and simple weapons like daggers and slings. A sling can hide as a belt or a loose bit of leather, and its bullets can fill a purse like a coin purse, looking safe and respectable at the same time. When he's not working, he likes to dress with style and flair, but being poor, this is not yet pulled off convincingly. In addition to blind-fighting he also has excellent direction sense, and the ability to use rope, on par with Fafhrd's.

Philip Kendricke (Magic-User played by Todd)

Phil is a young and inexperienced magic user. His parents left behind their Dunwich farmstead in order to take up studies, eventually becoming academics in the history of magic. They had Phil late in life, their only child, and he was raised in an open and inquisitive environment. Having recently completed his studies, Phil has returned to the Dunwich area to visit extended family and to see what adventures may be available.

Despite being an attractive young man, Phil is detached from most people and is basically a guileless nerd. Having lived a life of academia, Phil is desperately eager to experience the world beyond books. Aware of his weaknesses as an adventurer, he is looking to find capable compatriots with which to commiserate.

Phil tries to live up to a self-imposed idea of modesty, wearing simple robes and carrying a crudely handmade wooden staff. Nonetheless, the gate guards at Rookroost keep trying to charge him with the "mage tax".

Garmanargar (Half-Orc Fighter played by Jennifer)

Garmanargar signed up with the party as muscle to help capture the Sea Ghost, after being contacted by her friend Phil. During the capture, she succombed to a poison gas trap that has left her unresponsive to revival attempts so far.

Further details of this character's history have been redacted until the player provides it to the DM.

Beroch (Human barbarian played by Sean)

Travels with a goat and a keg in search of better beer than barbarians can brew. On his first day in civilization, fell to conversation with a cleric. On his second day in civilization, signed up for an ocean cruise with a wizard, and was immediately ensorcelled. There are reasons barbarians hate magic.

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